My best friend accompanied us down for Christmas this year, so we have a full house. Lucky for everyone, we’re both on our period! #hormones #bloated #NSYNC
To be accurate, we’re both pretty much done at this point, but instead of posting about my period I’ve been binge-watching Arrested Development with my family and farting up a storm. Because of the #fullerhouse, I’m sharing a bed with my mom, so I have to hold my farts in all night to spare her! Because I’m so #selfless.
The only restaurant open in my mom’s nabe last night was The World’s Most Mediocre Indian Restaurant, at which we spent the entire meal attempting to convince ourselves of the edibility of the food in front of us. We might’ve succeeded were it not for the roach that scurried across the carpet toward our booth in horrifying pursuit as we were waiting for the check. We were the only customers there, but somehow that made our shrieking and leaps onto the booth all the more embarrassing in front of the restaurant staff. Literal actual PTSD.
I thought I was going to write more but as it turns out, it’s 12:18 AM already.